#Creating a Safe Space Within Yourself

Creating a Safe Space Within Yourself

By: Linnea Knisely, Perfectly Imperfect

Have you ever noticed how your growth slows when you feel unsafe, judged, or overwhelmed? In my last post, I wrote about the power of giving yourself the same self-compassion you’d give to a close friend. That’s the foundation but once I began to soften toward myself, the next step was to create a safe space, internally and externally. This is where the lasting growth is taking root.

The truth is: We don’t grow in chaos. We grow in safety.

What is a Safe Space for Growth Really Means

When I am talking about a safe space, I’m not just talking about a cozy corner or a therapist’s office (though those are both great options, too).

A true safe space for my growth was changing my mindset that allows room for mistakes. An environment that supports my healing, not just productivity. Relationships that make me feel seen and heard, not small or silenced. It’s the emotional and mental equivalent of sunlight and water, without it nothing blooms. For me I needed to make these changes so I could find peace.

Rewiring Your Inner Dialogue

I had to start rewiring my inner dialogue. One of the most powerful things I’ve learned is that growth doesn’t just happen when you get “motivated.” It happens when you stop torturing yourself with your own thoughts.

Here are a few ways to create more internal safety:

I started to give that harsh voice in my head a silly name or a softer one. When it pipes up with, “You’ll never get this right,” I will pause and gently say, “Thanks, (silly name), I am doing things differently now.” I had to start speaking to myself like someone I love.

I wouldn’t say it to my best friend during a tough time, I had to remind myself not to say it to myself. The next time you are speaking to yourself harshly say this instead, “I see that I’m struggling. I still believe in myself.”

Give yourself permission to be messy. Perfection isn’t a requirement for growth, I am finding safety is. Safe people don’t expect you to be flawless. Be one of those people for yourself.

Here’s a list of things I have done to help create a safe space around myself:

It was so important for me to notice what was draining me. I then started to ask myself after conversations, commitments, or even scrolling through social media: “Do I feel more grounded or more drained?” Then I started to choose less of what drains me and more of what lifts me. I started to set boundaries that protected my peace. This might look like saying no to certain gatherings, unfollowing accounts that make you doubt yourself, or simply taking a break.

After I started surrounding myself with safe people. I realized safe people don’t always say what you want to hear but they say it with care. They make space for your whole self, not just the perfect parts.

Ask yourself: “Who in my life makes me feel seen, supported, and safe to be myself?”

Be Real Not Perfect!

Here’s a little recap to keep in your journal or on your phone:

Self-talk that feels kind and grounded.